Your Audience

I am your undeniable audience
Each of your performances runs
errors emphasized
riding triumphs
even the ordinary is dramatized
Your voice is heard
weeping inside every laugh
nervous at each gesture
You can't stand to be given
any less attention
You have to  have the focal point
all the time, always
You over shadow your audience
an expense paid by the producers
and every attendee
Blabbering unendedly
pointing out the pointless
always gripping and dragging
in into your shallow pool
I am your audience
That's the only way you see me
Someone to listen
to clap at your back flips
to frown at your falls
to cry when you're crying
To die while you're dying
This is a one way relationship
down a very long trivial road
You just don't listen
I don't think you ever will
it's a shame that when you
finally settle in to your
comfortable casket
your ears will no longer work
Because the difference between
your life and death
will be the final interval
of your lowering eyelids

The Stranger Jason

"Now can you tell me who said that?"
I thought it was a trick question.
The Bible verse that this stranger had just quoted was both foreign and familiar.
Hesitantly, I answered
"I believe that was Jesus who said that."
"That's right! That's right!"
He quickly continued
"Ok, Ok, now let me ask you this..."
He stepped in close.
"What kind of hater are you?"
This was a new one.
I hadn't been asked this question before and he knew it.
His dark lips bent into a tiny smile.
"Hmmm..." I thought
"Invisible!" I finally said
"Oh, invisible, huh? Why's that?"
"'Cause my hate is unseen. It doesn't exist!"
"Ok, ok. You don't hate anything? Ok. That's good."
We nodded our heads in confident agreement as if our necks were made of springs.
He didn't waste a second.
"Ok, well I know how to be the ultimate hater..." He said pointing his skinny dark finger.
"Oh, Ok, Is that right?"
"That's right, but you know what gets me up in the morning?"
"What's that?"
"This prayer. This prayer gets me up every morning. Now repeat after me..."
He began to recite and I followed him, mimicking his words, but arbitrarily inflecting the sounds.
I was locked in.
As he spoke, as I repeated, his features became more apparent;
Dark, smooth skin, that  of a Church man,
a crimson button up shirt, black pants, shiny black shoes,
and a neat afro atop his head.
He was wild with reverence.
His teeth were long and broad and slightly yellowed at the gums
as if they had been baptized back to white.
Our call and response prayer lasted about a minute or two
then we shook hands, hugged, and introduced ourselves.
His name was Jason.
He walked away and with a smile, he turned back towards me and shouted,
"Alright, Blaine. I love you, man!"
Rejuvenated and humored, I smiled, laughed, and called back, "Alright, man. I love you, too!"
The stranger named Jason carried on with his bold stride,
the red folds of his clothes rippling in the wind,
I turned and walked the entire three mile length home,
a resurrection awakened within me. 

Think of Me

For me, it is hard to write about someone I love.
It is hard to craft words into a magical order
that portrays a correct verbal measurement
of the warm golden light I feel when kissed by my lover.
It is hard to write, but easy for me to see
our bodies curled together beneath cotton sheets.
I can easily feel my fingernails gently raking across
the warm skin of my lovers soft buttocks.
A map of my lovers body is imprinted in me
It guides me to the familiar quiet corners,
the cozy pockets of rippled skin folding outwards and in
sweet valleys of soft prickly hair
subtle scents that only I would smell
These are the places where I dwell
anxious for the gift of moist lips on my neck
nostalgic of skinny fingers tickling me.
All selfish desires fortified by selfless deeds,
like giving my lover all she needs.
It isn't easy for me to say
that I think about my lover everyday
And when I don't I find it strange
then proceed to think of her once again.

Rose

Somewhere in this garden
lie a slow dying rose.
Brittle and dry pedals
tightly packed together,
slowly drying out in unison.
The sweet scent has faded,
the lush red body now
tiny and gray.
Not even the graying thorn
is sharp enough
to accidentally prick
an oblivious passer by.
She lie hanging the only rose
in a thicket of pointy branch and vine.
When once hungry bugs would
chew at her nourishing loins
the busy creatures now
crawl over and around her,
occasionally sitting atop her head
to admire the view.
On particularly cold, clear,
moonlit nights, the nearby daffodils
can hear Rose sigh.
A ghostly sound, her breath stretches
only an inch, mixing in with the cool breeze.
"These sighs are not apologies"
cries Rose
"These breaths are not regrets.
What was taken from me was also given,
for I have never possessed excess, but
have been claimed by many
to be amongst the bounty."
The posies can only look away with saddened jealously,
shivering in the chill.
Icy water has gathered on Rose,
the cold perspiration sometimes softly drips below,
drowns a few ants, and sends the others scurrying about.
This is as close as Rose ever comes to crying.
She hangs her head and a flaky leaf
breaks and drifts swiftly away.

Time takes time
and time needs more time
My whole life
is time after time

In Kindness and Cruelty

"I can tell you right now, she's not the one..."

I rolled my eyes and half smiled.

"Yea I know, but maybe she is? I mean probably not, but you never know is all I'm saying."

My sisters hefty Acura belted down the freeway, tightly hugging the curving stretch.

"She's really smart..." I continued "Tall and pretty..."

Then I stopped myself.

I was repeating myself. 

I became a broken record, I became my Mom.

This was before she left me hanging again,

the one who is not the one, that is. 

She is, however, the meanest fairy in the woods,

perhaps the fairest.

However, she is capable of issuing the most unfair.

She's kind in text and texting

and scatters happy faces across compliments, but

like her Father is to her

she has become to me, and she can't seem 

to get enough of him.

Bad Friendship Haiku

I hate our friendship

It really fucking sucks

Not much more to say

Silent Disco

"...do something creative."
she demanded
muscle memory slickly rolled
her eyes in a little circle
rising over my left shoulder
resting beside my right.
"Creative?" I thought,
"Haha, Ok" I said
taking the cardboard cutout.
I snuggled my hairy cheek
against the rough edge
squeezed my eyes closed
and smiled.
A quick snap and she snatched
her room mates head-on-a-stick
out of my grip and stamped off
like a spoiled child or worse
a jilted lover.
"Haha, Ok." I thought, but
this time in a more dismissive tone.
"Look babe..." I again thought,
"If you wanted to dance last night
you should of stayed awake."

Oceans

Such a deep blue

like oceans of oceans

blue

what am I to do?

mirrors on mirrors

of me, of you

I have no time

only alibis

I have no fear

only courage is here
Delicate white
on the water
dancing on delicate
twilight.
Rivers
shimmering

Thank you
for bragging about him
telling me how great he is
how you're crazy about him
It's nice to know you still
try
to make me jealous.
this is nothing new
you've done this before
just like your tattered edge poems
your emotions are frayed
too much tear will
eventually pull completely apart
and not even your Mother
bless her heart
could sew those seems
this is why I choose
an apathetic attitude
cause I know you
"he's this, he's that"
fantastic. enjoy.
you and his business
could monopolize
an enterprize
meanwhile you work hard
at resolving an unsettled
never resting
yearning for
sex love
But give, I plead
Give love!
I plead
Because you will always
be loved
as a prized flower
in a vast garden
However,
even the most beautiful flowers
no matter how poisonous the pedals
or how prickly the stems
will give away with all repose
their sweet pollen 

Cupids Trick

She may be...

More Independent
More Experienced In Life
More Arrogant
More Sex-Driven
More Into Exercise
More Experienced In Sex
More Thrifty
More Confident
More Cool
More Spontaneous
More Optimistic
More Kinky
More Extroverted
More Aggressive
More Adventurous
More Scientific
Less Spiritual
Less Kind
Less Love-Driven
Less Old-Fashioned
Less Pure
Less Conventionally Moral
average

Interested?

Go ahead…

Send her a message